A friend asked me the other day whether I had any plans to start an exercise routine now that chemo is finishing soon.  When I didn’t really have an answer, he seemed sort of surprised, even a bit disappointed. 

What I didn’t explain is that when you are facing something that almost killed you and is still trying to kill you, you don’t really think past the end of treatment.  When you are receiving drugs that make the simplest, routine things feel impossible, you usually can’t think more than a couple hours ahead at a time.  And besides, when the drugs leave you unable to concentrate for more than a few minutes at a time, any plans end up as mostly empty pages you don’t understand when you look down on the page.

That said, there is one thing I plan and hope for when I think of the near future.  I hope to travel to the three other places I have called home.  Travel to Toronto to visit my family, who haven’t seen me since this all began.  Travel to Montreal to see my favourite city once again and visit old friends that have been so supportive.  And return to NY for the 10th anniversary of that terrible day in September because being anywhere else on that day just wouldn’t feel right.